Death by Pop-Tart


So last night I was sauteing some sliced zucchini and fluffing the brown rice with a fork when it occurred to me that I was starving. It wasn’t just a little pull at my strings hunger it was a deep down low rumbling that was about to transform me into a bear like form and start pawing at the cupboards until something sweet and delicious hit my shriveled up and alone taste buds. Quick side note… If there was anything that I would change about our family’s shopping habits it is that we are kinda a one time grocery shopping family. We shop for the week or two and that’s it until next paycheck. It’s something that started when we were about to have our first child. I decided to quit my job and stay at home so our once cushy bank account dwindled to the bones and that’s when we began this one shopping day, pay check to pay check kind of life. Skip ahead almost 6 years later… while our account is no longer in a skeleton like state we still have this habit of getting down to the last drop of food before returning to the store. So I’m standing there trying hard not to open the cabinet door and pilfer around and decide to keep my head on straight and continue making this healthy dinner for my family. I knew my husband was on his way home and we would be eating within 20 minutes. Now another thing that should be taken into account before you judge me too much about complaining about being hungry when obviously there are people who are actually starving in this world… the one thing you should know is that….


So with that being said it’s a little more understandable at least to all you breast-feeding past or present ladies out there. There were times in my life I could go an entire day without eating (totally not healthy) but as soon as the babies started popping out I have been pretty much on the verge of fainting at all times unless I’m properly nourished and even then I’m a little unstable. Something about having kids clinging to you 90% of the time I’m sure.

So, as you probably guessed by the title, I did open the cabinet door and while it was pretty bare a lovely, brightly colored box jumped out at me. Brightly colored boxes in a cabinet usually mean only bad things… processed, sugary, fatty, bad for you food. And thus it was. My husbands supply of strawberry pop-tarts that he buys and eats all by himself. My kids have never tried such things and I’ve only dabbled as an adult –  those are my weak moments. The moments that I don’t usually talk about and hide them away under my shirt until I can work them off. Last night was one of those nights. I gently peeked in the box and much to my surprise a sleeve was open already and while one pop-tart was gone there was its other half staring up at me with the icing and the sprinkles and so I began. At first just a pinch here and then a pinch there and by the time I knew it I was opening another sleeve! AHHHHH This couldn’t be happening. I quickly chewed on my second pop-tart not wanting my husband to get home and see the crumbs on my mouth and the strawberry jam on my fingers. I heard the front door and quickly gobbled it up and got rid of the all-knowing empty sleeves. I turned off the stove and starting plating the food as my husband came around the corner to greet me. One kiss and he knew…

“Now now now someone has been in the pop-tarts.”

Dang it. The one piece of evidence I forgot about… the extremely sweet and sugary residue that was left. Now my husband didn’t think I was disgusting or a pig all he said was…

“See, every once in a while everybody needs a pop-tart!” And walked back around the corner picking up the children and throwing them in the air, a smug smile on his face.

Oh by golly the pop-tarts had won this round and pretty much the rest of the night my stomach kept reminding me of my indiscretion. The pain was unbearable, I could barely eat the healthy dinner I had prepared and I pretty much felt like death for the next ten hours. While I’d like to say that I will never again be seduced by that brightly colored box and the sweet death inside I can’t honestly commit to that… but I will say that I should be good for another year or so before I forget and re-enter the box of my dreams and nightmares!

Happy MOSTLY healthy eating!!


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