Conversations with a 3 year old-
Back story, we have an 11 month old who is pulling up and stands on his own for less than a second. This conversation took place because of one of those split seconds balancing acts.
3 year old says as she watches her brother standing up.
“Our baby is getting so big!” She exclaims with a huge grin
“I know he’s getting so big. Should mommy have another baby?” I ask
“Oh no no, that would be just horrible!” She scrunches her nose and shakes her head.
Haha I do believe 3 years olds are super intuitive so I think I’m gonna have to agree with her this time!!
My stuff is better than all of your stuff.
That is what an almost 4 year old told me today. I’ve heard the same thing from this same little kiddo a few times but this time I was deeply offended.
Yes, an almost 4 year old deeply offended me. (Oh I love kids and how they can make you feel bad without even knowing it or trying. Yes I was offended, I’m not proud) It’s not because what they said is true or that I’m envious of “all of their stuff” but it’s more of a situation where as a parent of the same age kids I can’t imagine my kids saying this to anyone and for that matter multiple times. (It would break my heart just a little if they looked at things like this or made other kids feel bad. I’m sure there will come a day though…:/) I know that kids will be kids and they say stuff not knowing really what they are even talking about but I have explained it to this particular child so many times. My kids have even responded with…
“But we have to be happy with what we have and what we get.”
My response is about the same, just a little more in-depth such as,
“Your stuff is better than my stuff, huh? Well your face…. ”
Pause, remain calm, I am 30 and this is a child… approach changes…
“It’s not about the things we have but the people who we get to share it with, like our brother and sisters or our neighbors and even people that we don’t know but don’t have as much as we do.”
My kids seem to understand this (and I’m not saying they are rays of sunshine all the time themselves.) There have been fits when they don’t want to do something or leave a certain place. My daughter is as stubborn as they come. I get it, they are kids and they are learning how to express their feelings and emotions and how to respond to certain situations and sometimes it’s not always how I want them to act. Okay okay okay now that all being said…
“My stuff is better than all of your stuff.”
Said in various ways to me and my kids the last few times we’ve been around this child is really starting to get under my skin and I automatically think, this kids parents are creating a monster. (Those are just my instant ideas, I’m sure it’s not true and I’m sure they are just lovely!) I have to pull my annoyed feelings inwards because again I do realize that this cute little kiddo is only 4ish.
I also realize that this is one of many times my kids may be told things like this, that children will not treat them kindly or fairly and that they will probably wonder or start feeling like they deserve more, that it’s normal for others to get everything they want right when they want it and if its normal for these other kids then why aren’t they given everything their hearts desire as well. So I really can’t hold it against this child (maybe their parents;) but I can try my hardest to instill in my children what the most important desires of our hearts should be. Not to desire things but to desire love, a generous heart, a giving spirit, our family and friends and people in general. A genuine love for God.
Those things are my desires for my kiddos and for others kiddos as well. Even the ones that tell me how horrible all of our stuff is. 😉
So, moral of the story, here’s to not letting a cute little almost 4 year old hurt my feelings… again.
This picture pretty much sums up our night. My 2 year old is obsessed with popcorn. I went in to tuck her in for the thousandth time and she asks.
“Are you eating popcorn?”
“Yes, yes we are sis. I have some saved for you for snack tomorrow.”
“Can I see it?” She asks
Ummmm No Way! I think to myself as I gently tuck her in, shake my head and give her a kiss on the cheek.
She is a popcorn eater and she will eat the entire bowl if she was left on her own. I imagine this picture is what she is thinking and looking like right about now!
You would think having 3 babies and a husband and a mortgage would have brought the adult out in me but it hasnt, it’s been more like playing house. I get to burp and feed and dress my babies just like I did when I was six and had 20 pretend babies. Ive been practicing my whole life for that and I used to pretend I had husbands all the time too, they were fake and usually in the shape of a pillow but they were mine so…
I got taller but seem to have never stopped playing. That was until the last few months. I think that everything was all kinda coming at me real slow like and then
it hit me like a tractor. I saw it coming but wanted to keep picking flowers and didn’t move in time. Now I am an adult and I don’t quite know how to act or react.
Here are the 6 reasons why I’ve been kicked in the butt by adulthood.
1. We are saving up for a van, yes a van, but with 3 kids packed like sardines in the back seat of our SUV the idea of a van makes my heart melt.
2. I wear elastic waistbands all the time, I mean all the time!
3. I want to redo our house so we can sell it and buy the house we are gonna die in.
4. Makeup just doesn’t matter any more. While I do like to doll up still it is very rare that I have time for it. My face is naked and haggard and I just don’t have a chance to care.
5. I went to a pampered chef party and bought measuring cups….. measuring cups people!
6. I told my daughter she needed to fix her attitude, which is identical to what my mom said to me growing up.
I realize that these are silly reasons but when I noticed them and felt them all within a couple weeks of each other the word adulthood took my breath away.
I shall explain in a few short sentences, I am not at all afraid of getting older. I shrieked with glee when I turned 30. I will not dye my gray hairs and I will not get too fussy when I start wearing elastic pants all the time (wait, already there!). But the actual adulthood thing… eek. For some reason when I think of an adult I think of someone who doesn’t skip anymore or laugh out loud, or really have any fun at all.
I realize I totally have a misconception of the word.
The actual definition of adult:
having attained full size and strength; grown up; mature: an adult person, animal, or plant.
Being a mature grown up never hurt anybody I suppose. It’s what my parents always wanted for me. (sigh)
So instead of running away and sulking I will just have to pull up my elastic adult pants and skip ahead. Embrace that word like I did 30 and pay my bills on time.
Yay for me!
(Knock knock joke from a two year old)
“Excuse me daddy, I’m gonna tell you a knock knock joke now.” Little Misses says.
“Okay, go ahead.” Daddy says
“Who’s there?” Daddy asks.
“Mary Christmas and Happy Holidays.” Two year old then smiles shyly and runs off laughing hysterically.
She obviously has her dads sense of humor.😂