Tag Archives: parenting

My 3 Minute Shower

This was my day, it reminded me of this post I wrote last year. Yes, my 3 minute showers are still a thing!!

Mommy Lanes Adventures

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I have become a master of the 3 minute shower. My shower time is cut in half with each child I have. I used to be a long shower taker, I would shampoo and scrub, lather and rinse and maybe lather again. I would condition and repeat. I would RELAX. Then my first little one came and my 30 minute shower dropped down to a 15 minute shower. He would sit nicely in his bouncer right in the doorway while I showered so I wouldn’t have to be away from this precious angel for long or I would wait until he napped and would jump in for a semi leisurely soak in the warm and RELAXING shower. My 2nd little one arrived and boy was I in awe. I cuddled and snuggled and frothed with delight but again my shower time dropped to about 8 minutes. The lathering never…

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“Parenting is hard!” – Well what did you expect?

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The last few days, it seems like everywhere I turn I read something or I hear someone complain about how hard parenting is. (And I’m not talking about a humorous post about all the shenanigans throughout parenting or a passing “this child is crazy” phrase that we all think and sometimes say) Mega parent complainers who are tired, they are worn out, they need some “me” time. They are actually rude and almost unforgiving toward their own child. I kinda want to say and in most recent instances have had to bite my tongue…

“Well what did you expect?”

What in the world are we expecting parenthood to be. If we do it right and actually want what is best for our children then yes it’s going to kick our butts from time to time. The gray hairs are gonna come, the tired eyes, the frown lines, the headaches, the heartbreak, the tears, worry, fear, exhaustion and doubt… etc etc etc etc…

It seems to me that most parents think they are getting into some sort of ‘walk in the park’ adventure. They think having a baby is going to be like those toys that came out in the 90’s, you know the ones… Nano Pets or the Tamagotchis. Those things were the bee’s knees for like a week when I was ten.

I feel like as parents we focus a lot on the negative, on “woe is me” scenarios and we keep reminding everyone how hard parenting is when what we should be reminding everyone and ourselves is although it is very hard it also ends way too soon. We should look at each day as a gift because that is what it is. No matter what you believe in, I don’t think many people could argue with that. I hear stories and know people who have lost their little ones to illness or tragedy. One day they are here and the next day they aren’t and if we can’t see how precious these days are that we have together then we are gonna miss them more when they are gone. And they will be, one day. Kids will grow up, parents will get older and these everyday moments that seem so annoying right now will be a faded memory. A snapshot tucked away in the family photo album.

I sure hope that when I look back one day that I’m not sad because I didn’t choose happiness and joy amidst all the chaos that is raising children. Instead of venting every chance I get (don’t get me wrong, I’m not unfamiliar with a good vent session and I’m not saying that sometimes they aren’t needed) I should remember that there will come a time when my child will no longer do the things that I find a little tiring in the season that we are in.

One day they will no longer…

Ask to be held for the thousandth time that day, and usually as soon as I have a fresh cup of coffee in my hand.

Crawl into bed with us in the middle of the night…. crushing many sensitive body parts in their path.

Beg us to lay down with them every night by wrapping their arms around our necks so tight we don’t know whether to start fighting for a breath or just give in and lay down.

Ask us to read “just one more book”

Try to eat the food we have because it looks better. “Me share with you mommy?”

Have potty accidents and seek us for help and comfort…. and the dreaded clean up.

There are so many more and I could really go on and on but those are some of the things that happen on a daily basis and sometimes I wanna pull my hair out. I’m only human! But then I remember(at least most of the time) that one day they will be all grown up and I will ache to hold them, console them, cuddle with them, take care of them, clean up after them. I will miss stealing one last peek of them in their beds at night.

These moments should be embraced with compassion, not complained about to the point of becoming cruel to our children(whether to their face or not) and continually casting them as the subject of all our complaints.

We were once children ourselves after all!!

So here’s to embracing rather than complaining.

At that time the disciples came to Jesus, saying, “Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?” And calling to him a child, he put him in the midst of them and said, “Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.
-Matthew 18:1-3

“Adults are just outdated children.” 
  — Dr. Seuss 

“Children need models rather than critics.” 
  — Joseph Joubert, French moralist

The Beautiful Disarray of Play

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A short and sweet account!

Today when my son asked me to go to his room to play with him and his “guys” I followed him in and sat down without much thought. Almost immediately I could feel the disarray of his room glaring at me from every corner. A random bunched up sock lay in the middle of the room, shoes piled up under the bed, toy buckets tipped over. My first instinct was to clean while I played. I’m pretty sure that’s what I usually end up doing when I “play” in my kids rooms. I end up cleaning. Today I just played. Buzz and Woody were superheros today, they had a mission to save Batman and Robin from Joker’s Lair. Today I really enjoyed the playful part of being a parent. I left the sock on the floor and the shoes under the bed for another day and I played.

I Will Miss Even the Worst Days

Time and time again I have heard the phrase, “One day I will miss this.” How often do we say that to ourselves? How often do we say that out loud? One day I will miss the sweet smell of my children right after a bath, one day I will miss these snuggles, one day I will miss watching them sleep, one day I will miss letting them help me cook, playing barbies with them, building blocks, etc. One day we will miss all the good times that we had when our children were little, we will miss watching them grow up, we will miss those sweet moments. One day I will look back and wish that I could rock them again and wipe the tears from their eyes. I think we can all agree that we will and do already miss the good stuff. The stuff that makes our hearts melt and our thoughts just a little sweeter. After just having our third and last baby I have been trying to embrace him, embrace every moment because it will be the last time we ever have a newborn. I actually cried when I changed him out of his last newborn diaper, and I thought this is the last time I will ever be doing this. May sound a little crazy but right now I am enjoying every minute because one day I know that I will miss it. Through all these sappy yet lovely last mental pictures I’ve been taking with my kids during their most amazing milestones I got hit with a brick by a very unlikely source.

Comedians In Cars Getting Coffee with Jerry Seinfeld

Yes, this show that my husband convinced me to watch and that I liked right away. This was probably the 15th episode that we had watched and I bet you can’t guess which guest blew me away with his insight. Louis C.K. Yes. Not that I don’t think that he is a good comedian but honestly I can’t really say for sure because I’ve never watched his stand up but I sure did like him on Parks and Recreation. Anyways, he was talking about his children and eventually he got around to saying that…

“You can miss anything in life even the bad, I’m gonna miss this, there is gonna be a day when I don’t get to do this again.”

That’s when I thought, wow isn’t that the truth. I don’t think I’ve every felt that way in the middle of one of my kids tantrums in the supermarket or when my kids ask me the same question over and over and over again times 50. I think my initial thought is, when is this going to be over but now I look at these moments differently. I look at the messy house that I just cleaned not even 10 minutes ago with a little bit more grace. I see this world before me and I know what my part in it is right now and that is to care for these precious little people whom I’ve been blessed with, through the good, the bad and the ugly and I know that one day when they are all grown up and living their own lives and my house is spotless and I finish my grocery shopping in record time that I will miss those messy moments. I will miss those moments that make me want to pull my hair out and lay in a fetal position until the house magically cleans itself. I’m not saying that this new insight will make those moments any less stressful but there is a little joy that comes in even on the worst days. So thank you Louis C.K. you have made even the worst of days a little bit brighter!