Tag Archives: writing

Fear in a Blank Page

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Have you ever just stared at a blank page? All those thoughts and ideas screaming to be scribbled out in front of you but instead they seem to be scattered among the chaos in your mind. My imagination and creativity seem to have lost themselves, not only in the fear but somewhere in the loads of laundry and the wild pack of children pulling at my clothes.

The idea of writing doesn’t scare me but when you add the word successful to the mix, that terrifies me. It makes the tiny hair on my arms stand up and the pencil fall from my grasp. While writing this, I was compelled to look up the meaning of the word successfultwo meanings showed up:

  • Accomplishing an aim or purpose.
  • Having achieved popularity, profit or distinction.

That second one is what terrifies me, there comes with it a tower of self-doubt that would inevitably cause my desire and love for writing to collapse in around itself. But the first one, I think I can get on board with. To me, it means that successful writing is in the eye of the beholder. Regardless of the money or the resources or the time spent on it, if I read something that changes the very rhythm of my heart and soul then I characterize that as successful writing. So in that very way I shouldn’t be fearful to write but encouraged and inspired to scribble my heart out on the lines, even if only one person reads it and finds something of meaning or comfort in those words, that in itself is successful. So, my only thing to fear is fear in a blank page. Now to find a way to push through the chaos and the chores and the requests and demands of everyday life and put pencil to paper or fingers to keys and write.

 

 

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Missing Monday

The last two weeks I’ve been stuck in my head a bit. I have not made time to write or blog and I’m starting to feel the affects of my neglect. The last two weeks have been extremely busy so it’s not like I’ve just been sitting around doing nothing but regardless I have missed this lovely, stress free blog of mine and of course all the lovely readers and writers that I enjoy so much. (I’m talking about you!) So what have the last couple weeks looked like.

There was my parents 60th and 56th b’day parties. My dad’s 60th was quite the little shindig. Our bathroom remodel, which is almost complete and has left many proud blisters on my hand from all the painting and sanding and screwing. There was also a suspicious lump that had me referred to a Dr and an ultrasound. I like to think that I wasn’t too worried about it but I think it consumed my mind more than I would like to admit. Luckily it is something that is most likely nothing and just needs to be watched so mostly good news there. So…

Here I am back with an urgent need to write and get back to “normal”. Here’s a little picture of part of my bathroom. My favorite part so far but I haven’t begun to decorate yet so my favorite could possibly change in the near future.

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As you can see, my old vanity was a sad honey oak little drab but with some paint, new handles, new vanity top and faucet, it is a breath of fresh air and I can’t wait to start using it. My bathroom is so much lighter and brighter, simple and sweet and well… it just makes me smile. I have several ideas for some reclaimed barn wood that my parents have that I hope to have turned into a pretty groovy hanger/shelf for our towels. I’m sure I will blog about it.

So here’s to getting back to it!:)

Discover New Blogs: Liebster Award

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I was nominated for the Liebster Award by Tracie at lifeoftracie. First of all, thank you so much for the nomination and sorry it took me awhile to finish. Love being able to share with and get encouragement from other bloggers. We gotta stick together!:)

Here are the rules for the new nominees which I will post at the end of this post.

LIEBSTER AWARD RULES:

1.Thank the person who nominated you and link back to their blog.

2. Display the Liebster Award on your blog.

3. Share 11 random facts about yourself.

4. Answer the 11 questions you were asked.

5. Nominate 11 bloggers with less than 200 followers for the Award and have them answer 11 questions.

6. Let the other bloggers know you’ve nominated them.

7. Copy the rules into your post.

Here are the 11 random facts about me and the 11 questions I was asked.

1. I have a thing for coffee. I fall asleep thinking about the cup of coffee I’m going to have in the morning. Sometimes I can’t sleep because I’m so excited about it.
2. I make lists for everything and if I don’t complete it or if I think it’s not “just right” I make it again. It’s my one OCD quality.
3. My husband says that I’m messy and he prefers a clean house more than I do.
4. I have written a book and hope to publish one day. I probably need to focus more on that.
5. I’m not a complainer, don’t care for it and just try to stay positive.
6. I used to want to be a baker but then got busy.
7. I used to have major crushes on David Duchovny and Harrison Ford when I was in middle school. Still have folders of facts and pictures of them in my attic somewhere.
8. I don’t like feet, don’t want to see them and definitely don’t want to touch them. (Except for my kiddos feet, love those feet.)
9. I am a huge daddy’s girl. HUGE! But all my sisters are too. He’s definitely someone to love!
10. I absolutely love coffee.
11. I’m 30, gotta start working on my bucket list.

11 Questions asked and answered

1. What was your favorite toy as a child? I had a baby doll that had curly hair and would say I love you when i pressed her wrist.

2. If you could do ANYTHING today, what would you do? I would love to fit in my pre-baby baby baby jeans. I’m slowly on that path but would love to be there already!

3. What are you listening to? Right now- my baby crying it out in his crib:/. In the CD player – Good Morning Baby in Spanish. But I wish I was listening to Switchfoot.

4. Who is your favorite fictional character and do you have a reason or just because? I’ve got mommy brain right now, I know I have one or several but could take days to think of so I will move on.

5. What is your favorite holiday and why? Christmas, I love the spirit of it. i love the reason for it and I love the food that’s involved.

6. Star Wars or Star Trek? Never seen either but probably Star Wars, Harrison Ford was in that right? 😉

7. Who’s your favorite James Bond? The most recent I think. It’s the only one I’ve really watched.

8. Do you have a favorite game and what is it? I love Aggravation. Grew up playing that with my family, still play when we all get together.

9.What is you least favorite word or the word that makes you cringe? Don’t have one.

10. Do you play and instrument and if so what? Clarinet in middle school but was always placed in last chair. So no I don’t play an instrument. :/ 😉

11. Who is your favorite Youtuber or do you have one? Nope, no time for Youtube.

I want to nominate the following blogs because I really enjoy reading your posts, you are inspiring and fun to keep up with!:)

http://thejoyoffive.com

http://bikurgurl.com

http://journeytohealthyyou.wordpress.com

http://mamastrong.co/2015/12/17/3-reasons-we-dont-do-the-whole-santa-thing/

http://adventureswithsix.wordpress.com

http://threeisthemagicnumberblog.wordpress.com

http://h20walkerlife.wordpress.com

http://afternoonofsundries.com

http://paintboxmum.wordpress.com

http://jhkane45.wordpress.com

http://seriousmomblog.wordpress.com

Here are your 11 new questions.

1. If you could travel anywhere, where would it be?
2. What is your favorite book?
3. If you could buy anything no matter the cost, what would you buy?
4. What is your favorite thing to do?
5. Outside or inside person?
6. What is something you would love to learn to do?
7. If you could change one thing about your life what would it be?
8. Who is your hero?
9. What is your favorite television show?
10. Coffee or tea?
11. What is your biggest pet peeve?

When Just the Act of Writing is Enough

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“We are cups, constantly and quietly being filled. The trick is knowing how to tip ourselves over and let the beautiful stuff out.”                                                                                                      -RAY BRADBURY, Zen in the Art of Writing

 

In my early 20’s I wrote a book. I had this dream of being a published author and that dream carried me through a very sketchy couple years working for a sketchy company that paid well and since I was single I had all the time in the world to write. I finished the “novel” in 2008 right around the moment that I met the man I was going to marry. So I didn’t try very hard to get it published. I was in that lovey dovey, everything is magical and hazy phase. It was beautiful… but my actual attempt at getting published was pretty futile and really I only have a handful of rejection letters to show for it.

The “happily ever after” marriage happened and the babies were born and the book went on the back burner of my desires. I’m a mommy and a wife and it has been more than enough. Just one thing though, I forgot that I was still a person with goals and dream and a passion. My family comes first, it always will and I will never regret that. I could have made time to pursue writing but I didn’t. My husband once said (not in response to my lack of writing) that people who say they don’t have time to exercise or read or sit at the table and eat dinner with their family or just about any excuse for not doing something are just saying it’s not a priority to them, its not important enough to make time. It made me think that maybe my love for writing should make that list of priorities. It may be closer to the bottom but it’s on there and has been since I’ve dug deeper into blogging. But now I think I’m ready to dig up that dusty book from those old forgotten corners of my mind and begin to work on it, proof read it, edit it and maybe even start again. I started putting it all on Nookpress.com a couple years ago because as much as I love rejection letters (I’m not lying I really do) I feel like that’s one of the hardest ways to get a book out there. Especially with all the technology these day. Darn technology standing in my way. I could really blame anything if I wanted to I suppose. Nook Press was something I didn’t finish again but it’s there for me to return to. If anyone has any stories with this self-publishing website please share!

Basically what I’m trying to get at is that writing is enough for me. While I may never become that published author I always dreamt of being, just the act of writing is enough for me. The process in itself is something I will never outgrow or lose my love for.

Now, that being said, if there are any pointers from all you accomplished writers out there please feel free to share your knowledge. I’m pretty much a sponge at this point in my writing journey.

Here’s to writing being enough!

An Unexpected Break

I have not forgotten the blogging world, it may seem like I have forgotten but I haven’t. I took a break that was not meant to be taken but was much needed. A few days after my last post about potty training my husband came home to tell me that he had lost his job that day and as a stay at home mom the world around me crumbled just a bit. I made him go into our room because he was upset and my then 2 year old already had a look of panic on his face. So off to the bedroom we went where he preceded to tell me what happened. While I won’t go into details I was not at all upset with my husband. I did not blame him nor did he need to be blamed but I will say that I was shocked and worried and although I stayed strong for him because that is what a spouse is supposed to do, stay strong and let the other lose it for a second, as soon as that was over I jumped in the shower and cried for about 30 minutes and then I was done. I was done getting upset and while I knew the worry wouldn’t always stay dormant I also had a peace that everything would be ok. Luckily we actually had a savings which hardly ever happens but somehow there was actually money in that savings account and for three months we lived off that while he looked for a job and guess what, the same month we were going to be out of money and have to sell an already paid off truck he got a job. A job that doesn’t pay as well but he loves and will be able to move up and around the company. A job that was our saving grace! Those three months were scary with two children under 2 and trying to live on no income but we did it and we are both still sane and I credit that all to God. I had faith, we had faith and after that first shock we sucked it up and did our best and tried to stay as faithful as possible besides the occasional snap at each other or brief frustration God got us through it! I can’t possibly give credit to anyone else especially myself because if I didn’t have him then I would have been a wreck the entire time but low and behold here we are, in one piece and happier for it! So the reason for the break from blogging…. well I don’t know. At first I was ashamed to tell anyone, even a blank screen that we were unemployed and then something more happened. I finished writing a novel about 5 years ago. It took me about 3 years to write because well, it was my first novel and I started as a teen and well, I’ll let you figure out the rest. Anyways I began reading it again. I started rewriting as I saw fit and I fell in love with writing all over again. Now I’m not claiming to be a good writer. The book may actually suck…. but I’m not giving up on it. So my husband got a job and I picked my passion back up off the table and discovered it all over again. I think this last 4 months have been amazing! My family is healthy, we are all happy, we have each other and no amount of money or lack there of will change that. This is my last year of my 20’s and my goal is to rock it’s socks off!